Meet My Main Character


For the record, I’ve never been invited to participate in a blog tour before. This will be my first, so, hopefully I do it right. The Meet My Main Character Blog Tour was started by Debra Brown. I was invited by Lara Willard, writer/editor/designer/mother/wife/geek. We follow each other on Twitter and WordPress. Meet Robin McGinnis, Lara’s MC, here.

Today, I’m bringing Pig Gongfermor for this blog tour. She’s the protagonist of my Arthurian parody, The Quest for the Holy Something or Other.

What is the name of your character? Is he/she fictional or historical? 

Pig is fictional. She is an original character not canon to the Arthurian universe. King Arthur, Wizard Merlin, Sir Kay, and Sir Lancelot all appear in the novel, but I take liberties with their characters. It is parody, after all.

When and where is the story set? 

Camelot and the surrounding landscapes. Medieval time frame.

What should we know about her/him? 

Insert excerpt from chapter one:


Not exactly how I imagine Pig, but you get the gist.

She was called Pig. Not for the reason one might suspect; rather, the name was lovingly bestowed upon her by her own father, Roger Gongfermor, who, having no formal education, thought it proper to name his child after the voracious manner of which she suckled from the bottle as an infant. Still, one could agree the name suited a girl who cleaned the cesspits as she came away from the job looking and smelling much like a wallowing pig. Filth coated her cheeks, and muck encrusted her shoulder-length hair, despite being kept beneath a tight leather cap. Even her clothes, from her leggings to the thigh-length tunic she wore over a wool undershirt, were so stained that the fabrics, originally varying in color, all appeared to be different shades of brown. A certain level of grubbiness was acceptable for those of the peasant class, but Pig’s level of uncleanliness caused even the most unwashed person to hide their noses in their sleeves and turn away.

What is the main conflit? What messes up his/her life? 

Pig is a humble gong farmer, who only dreams of the glories of Camelot. When she is promoted to the role of Sir Kay’s new page (as a joke) she thinks her dreams have come true. She soon discovers Sir Kay and Camelot are not everything she thought they would be. Rather than just accept things the way they are, Pig makes it her mission to “fix” her knight, even if against his will. Meanwhile, the self-proclaimed wizard, Merlin, concocts a plan to raise an army worthy of Camelot, but first he has to get rid of all the knights. So, he sends them on a quest for the Holy Gift Box–er–Bread Basket–whatever it is. On the way, Pig and Kay encounter insane pond dwellers, greedy salesmen, social isolates, and one zealous geocacher in search of the ultimate cache, all the while fighting against each other and the most emphasis villain of all–change.

What is the personal goal of the character?

Pig’s main goal is to achieve the dream of Camelot, which makes it hard for her to accept the reality. By the end of the novel, she comes to terms with her lot.

Is there a working title for this novel, and can we read more about it?

The Quest for the Holy Something or Other.

When can we expect the book to be published?

I’m completing the final edits this month. I am hoping to have it available in ebook format this fall or winter. You can follow me on Twitter @kbbetzner for more information as it is released.

Thank you for taking the time to meet Pig. I hope you enjoy the other authors on this tour.

This week, check out Nate Philbrick’s MC here.


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